sanity

It’s ten-thirty-two in the morning and I’m sitting on a bench. I’ve been waiting for what feels like hours. For nothing. A bird flies overhead. The bird doesn’t like you. The bird just wants to fly. I wish I could fly. There have been days where I wish wings could just burst out of my shoulder blades and take me into the skies. You’ll never fly.My brother said he’d meet me here. It’s three minutes past the time he said he’d be here. He’s not coming. Maybe he ran into an old friend. Maybe he thinks you’re crazy. Maybe he forgot he was meeting me. Maybe he thinks you’re not worth meeting. Whatever the reason, it’s nice to be outside. I don’t get to do this very often. Usually I sit in my house. Alone. with nothing to do but watch television. Only more voices to add to your head. He said we’d get coffee. Coffee makes you sick. Coffee is bad for you. I think I’d rather get tea and a scone. You pansy. You’re not worth meeting. You would think my brother would be here by now. But he’s not coming. He said, “Come on, Lucy. Just come outside and meet me tomorrow. You won’t regret it.” Yes, you will. So far I don’t. It’s beautiful out here. That’s because you’re uglier than everything else. The sky is blue. How your skin should be.The flowers are in bloom. Like you never were. And I know that my brother will come see me for the first time in years. If you only knew…

{from Jan. 2011}

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let me fly

why do dreams like to flaunt
bobbing around in your face
daring you to take a swipe
but you think you won’t strike

why do dreams like taunt
with sparkling diamonds and dust
begging to be taken into your hand
so you can travel to unseen lands

why do dreams make you cry
when you try to attain them
when you feel like there’s only so much
you can do to make everything just

why do dreams make you smile
hoping with every little fiber in yourself
that they will someday find their way
straight to you so you don’t stray

why can’t those dreams be true
all on their own without any help
so all the pain you go through in trying
won’t end up in failing but instead flying

a special song

The song begins–
a gentle hum of violins–
and wings unfold inside.
A heart ready to take flight,
a voice yearning to carry it
through clouds of melody
and winds of harmony
to a place where music can heal
every crack and fault one can feel.
A voice weaves it’s way through,
binding the soul and freeing it, too.
Vibrato sends comfort in ripples
and the lyrics beautiful yet simple.
A song to take away everything
and give so much more than anything.

straight to the sky

it’s a pathway
straight to the sky
forcing you to look up
from between the chains
as you move back and forth
to see the clouds, the blue skies
while feeling the wind whip past
not touching the ground
allowing your feet fly
your heart to soar
straight skyward
never landing