screw salvation

there’s something i’ve thought a lot about lately…
a lot of people are God-fearing, trying to be “good”
in order to live in heaven or be with God again.
but my thought is this…
why worry about salvation in the afterlife
when you should be worrying about
how to save your own life by simply living it?

instead of looking to the future,
how about looking into your present
and seeing your passions,
learning how you can share them
for the betterment of yourself
and everyone else?

how about simply having an idea
of where you want to progress to
instead of being concerned
whether one choice will spoil your chances
at a pleasant post-earth existence?

i’d rather worry about today
than wonder if i will make it to heaven…
you never know when you’re last breath will be
and i’d rather spend it doing everything i can.
heck, i would like to come back
just in case i don’t learn everything i can
in this life.
who says you only get to live once?
and in case one chance is all you get,
why not live in the moment
rather than in what may or may not be?
because no one really knows what’s waiting for us…
so why even worry about it?

just a thought… anyways, being a demon may be more fun than being an angel anyway.
at least demons aren’t afraid to get their feet dirty, especially when it comes to passion.


Where to Have Faith

Where’s the fun in being obedient?
This is right. That is wrong.
Who’s to really decide? God? The Universe?
Why not find a nice middle ground
where you can do both right and wrong
but not be judged but loved either way?

Because, when it comes down to it,
we are all doing our goddamned best.
We all make choices.
Some are wonderful and help the world.
Let’s face it… some are admittedly stupid
yet we can learn from them–
but that doesn’t mean we have to condemn
those actions that teach us the most.

We shouldn’t have to be forgiven
for our mistakes–we are human.
Those apologies are mostly to ourselves
and if I fall to saying sorry to myself
that would mean I regret what I do.
Fuck regret.
Why dwell so harshly on the past?
Why not embrace it all–
every last depressing, degrading and delicious
moment that makes us who we are?
Then we can move forward
with new knowledge, sometimes new strength,
to never forget but take it in stride.

So where’s the point in being obedient,
having faith where you disagree?
Why not have faith in ourselves,
that we can make it through anything
so long as we believe in own abilities
to make decisions based on experiences?
Have faith in family and friends,
the people you love and who love you.
They can help you too…
You never have to go it alone.
Just look over your shoulder
and at least one will be there for you.

My belief is that mankind is inherently good,
no matter color, attractions, beliefs or background.
My belief is that we all have a right to be free,
an innate right to be able to choose
the roads we may face, which signs to follow
and what part of the sky we want to fly to.

Have faith in yourself, because at the end of the day, that’s the faith that can matter most. 

what the scriptures say

words on thin pages
sometimes transparent
other times not
stories of men and women
often of just one
but mostly men
sharing power
taking power
fighting power
losing power
losing faith
and somehow winning
it all back again
faith in yourself
faith in a higher being
making sure you take
just the right steps
to believe

Pulling Grass

Stars scrape the eyes
night turns to dark
a prayer whispered
but not unheard
asking for the light
begging for truth
hands grasp each other
in desperate comfort
awaiting the unknown
unsure of a free fall
yet willing to trust
and pull the grass
up by the tips
hoping it won’t break
instead growing more
longer, stronger
even steadfast and sure
a prayer whispered
loud and clear
for strength to face
whatever comes my way

FWF ~ An Unexpected Paddle

“You’re up shit creek without a paddle…”

It took years… actually just a year and a half.
Not much, I know, but to me … it felt like ages.
No one ever told me how hard forgiveness could be.
Tough to forgive that other person,
even tougher to forgive myself for slipping even further.
It’s amazing the mental torment one can self-conflict.
Losing friends, trying to move on
and shedding tears not worth crying anyway.
I thought I was doomed to be “that” girl …
a girl I never wanted to be.
One who’d fall for stupid lies and
get completely scarred in the process.
So I took a break — from guys, from passion,
focusing solely on school and my health.
Those were things I could control.
There was the goodness of a friend that I love …
she showed me new things, a way to forgive
that I couldn’t ever expect myself to learn.
She showed me a prayer can help,
that friends can be true,
that you never have to do anything alone
and that you’re always loved…
no matter what.
And I believed.
The first step was forgiving him…
that seemed easy when it came to myself.
So I kept it up. That belief thing.
Crazily enough … it worked.
I may have forgiven myself …
but there are other people and situations
that haven’t earned my forgiveness yet.
Forgiveness had to be a lesson learned,
but is a constant work in progress.
Faith in myself and in overall goodness
just might make the difference.


a single glimmer
leads to a flutter
living inside my head
wanting out instead

nothing is stronger
imagining triggers
can it be brought to life
or catch the edge of a kinfe

hard to let it die, to let go
even tougher to not know
step forward, step back
pray that rope won’t snap

faith cannot do little
the rain starts to drizzle
threatening to wash it away
but then i stop to smile and say